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Introducing ‘Elizabeth,’ the ASP’s own advice columnist

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Dear Elizabeth, 

I am a freshman here at UAlbany and I have been having a really hard time making friends and fitting in. My roommate and I don’t really get along, so it has been hard for me to feel comfortable meeting new people, since I’m by myself most of the time. Everyone says that in college you will find your niche and that you will make friends that will be your friends for life. As of right now, I haven’t met anyone I would want to be friends with forever… I would rather just go back to high school. What should I do? 

Help! 

– Lonely Freshman” 

Dear Lonely Freshman,

First and foremost I want to say that you are not alone! I too had a rough freshman year and as I have gone on in my college career and met new people, I have found that more often than not they too had a rough freshman year. What you have to remember is that you just came from high school; a place that was likely smaller and more comfortable than a big school like UAlbany. It took you four years to establish yourself and create close friendships, so you have to be patient and open to letting that happen again. Try to get involved in things you like to do. I know that this is a big campus and that it is sometimes hard to find clubs or activities to join, but when you stumble upon an opportunity, take advantage of it! Don’t be afraid to do things by yourself, most other people do as well. Eventually you will find one or two other ‘lonely freshman’ to spend your time with and before you know it, you wont be so lonely anymore. In my experience, and the experience of many others I have spoken to, your best friends in college will come from unlikely places, through acquaintances, and some even through people you don’t like. Be open to taking risks and trying something new (but be smart of course). Remember that no one here knows you yet. You don’t have to live in the shadows of who you were, because college is a chance to be who you want to be. I wish that in my freshman year someone had told me that almost every other freshman was feeling the same way I was. Now that you know, go out and find someone just like you! Best of luck!

Sincerely,

Elizabeth

All questions and submissions should be sent to dearelizabeth.advice@gmail.com

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