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BDSM event smooths kinks and removes handcuffs of judgement

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Photo by Kassandra Parisi
Master R and Mistress M hosted an event, BDSM and Kink culture, part of UAlbany’s Sexuality Month. 
 

On Feb. 26, the University at Albany hosted an event titled “BDSM and Kink Culture with Master R and Mistress More.” The event was held as a part of sexuality month.

The event was offbeat, entertaining, informative and an eye-opening experience to the large mix of students who were present to listen to these two speakers who have had long careers in the world of BDSM.

Master R and Mistress More both work at the BDSM chateau known as La Domaine Esemar, which claims to be the oldest training chateau in the world. Master R established the chateau in 1993 with his original partner, who he met while hiking in the Catskills. “I bumped into her and I was able to feel her dominant energy,” Master R said. The establishment, 45 minutes outside of Albany, started out as something similar to a small bed and breakfast, and then grew into the business that brings in clients from all over the world.

Master R and Mistress More took the time to explain the lifestyle of BDSM which, according to them, is much more complex than most people believe. Mistress More said that her goal is to help people become comfortable with “bringing sexuality out of the bedroom.” They talked about how, in the BDSM world, there are people who are submissive and people who are dominant, otherwise known as “subs” and “doms.” At La Domaine Esemar, people are taught to explore both the submissive and dominant side of their own selves. Mistress More stressed that this was a learning process that every person completes at his or her own pace. She also mentioned that not only is La Domaine Esemar a place to learn about yourself, but that it is also a safe place in which you can express and explore your sexuality, whatever it may be, without being judged for it.

Master R is now a retired Master, but he has had a career in BDSM since 1969, during which time he was a professional submissive in New York City.

“When I was younger, BDSM was very unsafe. But when I had the opportunity to train with Masters in a good, safe environment, BDSM showed me a side of life that was extraordinary.”

The senses are very important to Master R. He believes that people today think too much, and never resort to simply using their senses.

“We are all beasts. Beasts rely on their senses, and that is what I try to teach people,” he said. “We can trace our ancestry back to everyone. Every one of us has the blood of a pharaoh, and every one of us has the blood of a slave.”

Mistress More entered the BDSM lifestyle at a very young age. Before working at La Domaine Esemar, she worked as a wilderness guide. That job taught her how to keep people safe.

She claimed that her job now is similar to her previous one, in that both required people to place their trust in her. She referred to herself as “incredibly kinky.” “I absolutely consider myself a sadist,” she said.

She was with a Master for five years, with whom she had a very personal relationship. “I found myself in submission, and it was a very personal process. I found a good person that I trusted who took me through the lifestyle. I learned what goes into making a person submit.” Master R claimed that Mistress More currently holds “the most complex job of any sex worker anywhere,” as she is responsible for carrying people through the process she went through at a pace that is comfortable and enjoyable for themselves. There is not an official training process or license that one gains upon studying BDSM, but Master R and Mistress more have been studying the art of BDSM for most of their lives, which qualifies them to provide their clients with an enjoyable sexual experience that is safe and not permanently damaging.

Many people were curious as to how a day in the life went. Mistress More told the group that she spends a good amount of the day dealing with business tasks. Sometimes she has sessions with clients. She and the Master both see to it that the slaves are doing their jobs, and are satisfied. The slaves are there to cook and clean. They are responsible for taking care of the house. Though the people in the house known as “slaves” consent to the lifestyle, they are slaves in every sense of the word. They are completely submissive to the hierarchy of Mistresses and Master. They are usually naked and eat on the floor.

“People are very dislocated from their senses. We teach our slaves to use scent,” said Master R.

However, Mistress More said, “Everything stops for couples.”

Master R and Mistress More do not conduct any business while there is a couple staying with them, in order to ensure that the couple feels completely comfortable and has the chance to immerse fully in the experience.

At the end of the event the question arises: does BDSM deserve to be only treated as kinky sex? The porn industry has evolved it into something that both Master R and Mistress More frown upon.

To them, BDSM is about having an enjoyable experience while at the same time, going on a soul-searching journey that could allow someone to better and expand his or herself.

By KassandraParisi 
Assistant News Editor 
theaspnews@gmail.com

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